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4. Drive Active Relationships
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22 mins

How to Reflect and Summarize

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The ability to reflect on and summarize what your partner has said is part of being an active listener and will improve the effectiveness of your session. 


Reflect on what you hear - Listen to your partner’s words and think deeply about it. Try to understand where they are coming from, what they mean and come up with your own ideas or thoughts on the subject. This shows your partner that you are listening and carefully considering what they have to say.


Observe – You should also pay attention to non-verbal cues and behavior you see. You may say, “I noticed you looked down when you said that…”, or “It seemed like your voice softened when you mentioned that person. Is there something more you want to say about them?” 


Summarize - Periodically, summarize what you have heard and check that it’s accurate. Summarizing and checking shows you’ve been listening and understanding what your mentoring partner has said. You may rephrase what they said and ask if it’s what they meant. It also helps you recollect important points they have mentioned or clarify anything that was unclear.

Give a shortened version of what you’ve heard by stating the key facts. Don’t try to interpret or add to it. Use this skill when you feel ideas are getting confusing, or when there seems to be more than one issue on the table.

You may use the Notes tab to summarize and keep track of any ideas or key points discussed during the Session so you have it handy for later. You may also refer to it before your next Session and keep track of your progress.

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What is Expected of Mentors?

Mentoring partners have expectations for each other.
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2 mins

Mentoring partners have expectations for each other. The better those expectations are understood, the more likely the mentoring journey will be successful. 

  1. Honors confidentiality - Confidentiality is the cornerstone of a mentoring relationship. Nothing can be shared outside of the meeting unless permission is obtained to do so. You can write private messages by going into a current Mentorship and clicking on the Messages tab – other mentors and mentees can’t see these interactions.
  1. Roles - Mentors are there to guide their mentees and provide support. Mentors should try to withhold judgement and keep an open mind. They offer feedback and advice if the mentee requests it.
    A mentor encourages and supports their mentee, believing in them and what they can achieve. They may also be willing to open up their network to their mentee. Since mentors usually have experience in the same field as their mentee, they can provide useful real life experiences and observations. 
  1. Commits to the process - Both mentors and mentees are expected to come to meetings prepared, on time, and committed to the process. Unless it’s an emergency, don’t change or cancel meetings. 
  1. Honest - Mentors are expected to be open, honest and authentic. They commit the time required to build a relationship with their mentee. They give mentees honest feedback and are open to receiving constructive feedback from them. 
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