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4. Drive Active Relationships

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22 mins

How to Reflect and Summarize

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The ability to reflect on and summarize what your partner has said is part of being an active listener and will improve the effectiveness of your session.

Reflect on what you hear - Listen to your partner’s words and think deeply about it. Try to understand where they are coming from, what they mean and come up with your own ideas or thoughts on the subject. This shows your partner that you are listening and carefully considering what they have to say.

Observe – You should also pay attention to non-verbal cues and behavior you see. You may say, “I noticed you looked down when you said that…”, or “It seemed like your voice softened when you mentioned that person. Is there something more you want to say about them?”

Summarize - Periodically, summarize what you have heard and check that it’s accurate. Summarizing and checking shows you’ve been listening and understanding what your mentoring partner has said. You may rephrase what they said and ask if it’s what they meant. It also helps you recollect important points they have mentioned or clarify anything that was unclear.

Give a shortened version of what you’ve heard by stating the key facts. Don’t try to interpret or add to it. Use this skill when you feel ideas are getting confusing, or when there seems to be more than one issue on the table.

You may use the Notes tab to summarize and keep track of any ideas or key points discussed during the Session so you have it handy for later. You may also refer to it before your next Session and keep track of your progress.

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How to Prepare for Your Mentoring Meeting as a Mentor

Your mentee is responsible for most of the preparation for their mentoring meeting.

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2 mins

Your mentee is responsible for most of the preparation for their mentoring meeting; however, here are some things you can do to make it more productive -
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1. Be in the right frame-of-mind:

Take time before your meeting to reflect on your mentee’s progress-to-date. Is the relationship working as expected?
Be fully present. Eliminate distractions (especially your phone!).

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2. Review the agenda and action plan:

Your mentee should have sent you an agenda before your meeting. It should include a timeline, an update from your last meeting, and input needed from you. Be prepared to suggest any needed changes to the agenda.
Review the action plan and tasks set from your last meeting and ask for an update at the beginning of your session.

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3. Goals:

Review the stated goals and milestones from your initial meeting and reflect on your mentee’s progress-to-date.

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4. Your Action Items:

Have you done your action items from the last meeting? Be prepared to provide an update.

Your mentee should be setting the agenda and sending an invite before each meeting. Be prepared to help them at first if necessary. Ensure you have synchronized your calendar so you can set up a date, time, topic and set an agenda for your session. You can also choose your preferred video conferencing platform so that you don’t have to set up new meetings every time you schedule a mentoring session.

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