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4. Drive Active Relationships

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22 mins

What to do in a Mentoring Meeting as a Mentee

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Mentoring works best with a structure. After having mentored thousands of people across many countries, we’ve developed a tested structure.

A structure will help both you and your mentor make your meetings more productive. Discuss the format with your mentor and ensure it suits them as well.

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1. Feedback And Update (10 Minutes)

Do a time check. “We scheduled an hour for this meeting. Does that still work for you?”
Describe your progress-to-date.
Keep track of the time.

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2.Discussion (30 minutes)

Spend most of your time on the Discussion. Your mentor may ask questions to help you think more deeply about your options. Don’t just ask for advice straight away; explore the possibilities. This is your time to have an in-depth discussion. After you’ve thought through the options, you can ask your mentor to share their experiences and advice.

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3. Close (20 minutes)

Review your tasks and goals with new timelines. Make edits if necessary.

Discuss each action. Do you understand them?
Do a reality check. Is your plan doable given other constraints? Update your goals to be realistic.

Determine when and where you will meet next. Set up a recurring meeting if you mutually agree on a time that works for both of you. Make sure this is in both of your calendars. Set an agenda, sync your Calendars, select your preferred video conferencing tool or choose a location for meetings.

Thank your mentor.

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How to Ask Challenging Questions

Asking challenging questions can be helpful to encourage deeper thinking about a situation.

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1 min

Asking challenging questions can be helpful to encourage deeper thinking about a situation. However, these questions need to be asked with care and sensitivity.

Sometimes “Why” questions can be seen as judgmental or speculative, for example, “Why did your team react that way?”; however, when used sparingly, they can be effective. Sometimes a “Why” question can be rephrased using a “What” or “How” question.

Asking questions that are challenging can lead to critical and reflective thinking and may help your mentee generate insights.

Challenging questions are usually:

difficult to answer
slightly out of the respondent’s comfort zone
non-judgmental
personal to the respondent and specific to the topic
push the respondent to think more deeply

Examples include: “What’s unique about your situation?”, “What critical feedback do you most often receive, and do you deserve it?”, “What dream have you given up on?”, and “What are you risking by not stepping out of your comfort zone?”.

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