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1. Get Ready for Mentoring

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22 mins

How to Be a Good Listener

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Listening is key to most relationships. We all know how it feels when someone pretends to listen, but does not give us their full attention. Mentoring requires strong listening skills.
A good listener hears not only what’s said, but also what’s left unsaid.

Here are some tips to become a better listener -
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1. Be present

First, put your phone on silent and keep it aside. Face your body towards the other person, and if culturally appropriate, make eye contact. Show you are interested. Check your posture–are you relaxed and open? Give your full attention.

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2. Stop talking and just listen

So often we do not give other people the space to talk. We interrupt them, finish their sentences, or talk over them. This shuts the other person down. Be silent. Give non-verbal cues showing you are listening. Allow for pauses so your mentoring partner can think more deeply.

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3. Remove distractions

If you are meeting virtually, set your cameras in a way that you can make eye contact. Remove distractions. Avoid distracting behaviors such as doodling, checking your phone and yawning. Offer your undivided attention.

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4. Be non-judgmental

Try to remove your prejudices and judgments from your interaction. Keep an open mind and fully listen. Show empathy. Try to step into your partner’s shoes and understand their perspective.

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5. Pay attention to non-verbal communication

Watch your partner and notice their gestures, expressions and body language. Are you sensing how they are feeling? What are they saying through their body language?

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Up Next

What to do in a Mentoring Meeting as a Mentee

Mentoring works best with a structure.

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xyz_mentee

2 mins

Mentoring works best with a structure. After having mentored thousands of people across many countries, we’ve developed a tested structure.

A structure will help both you and your mentor make your meetings more productive. Discuss the format with your mentor and ensure it suits them as well.

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1. Feedback And Update (10 Minutes)

Do a time check. “We scheduled an hour for this meeting. Does that still work for you?”
Describe your progress-to-date.
Keep track of the time.

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2.Discussion (30 minutes)

Spend most of your time on the Discussion. Your mentor may ask questions to help you think more deeply about your options. Don’t just ask for advice straight away; explore the possibilities. This is your time to have an in-depth discussion. After you’ve thought through the options, you can ask your mentor to share their experiences and advice.

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3. Close (20 minutes)

Review your tasks and goals with new timelines. Make edits if necessary.

Discuss each action. Do you understand them?
Do a reality check. Is your plan doable given other constraints? Update your goals to be realistic.

Determine when and where you will meet next. Set up a recurring meeting if you mutually agree on a time that works for both of you. Make sure this is in both of your calendars. Set an agenda, sync your Calendars, select your preferred video conferencing tool or choose a location for meetings.

Thank your mentor.

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